God chooses the foolish, so what about me? (1 Cor 1:27)

"But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong;" - 1 Corinthians 1:27

I came across this verse yesterday in my morning Bible study and had again a thought I've frequently had. That is, the Lord definitely uses the weak and those whom I would never choose to lead. He sets them in places of leadership and changes things the gifted fail to change.

Specifically I recall in college someone had united all the big campus ministries for a night of worship. It was a powerful evening like I hadn't attending in a very long time; we saw people come from all different denominations and walks of life and worship God together. At the end of the night they called up the guy who had arranged it to thank him. I was shocked. I knew him, and he was a total dork. He stuttered a little bit when he spoke (I suppose like Moses might have) and wasn't altogether generally well liked because he was socially awkward.

And yet the Lord used him in a powerful way. That night of worship in unity repeats every year now and I think has had a powerful impact on that school.

Now what gets me about this verse is my gifts. The Lord has made me bright, even semi-good looking, and comfortable speaking in front of people. I'm decently good at most sports I do, and most people enjoy interacting with me. That is, I would consider myself among the wise and the strong (maybe this makes me foolish in itself, but seriously, I've been greatly blessed by the Lord).

So when I read this I always wonder about the things I feel called to do. I feel called to do some pretty big things, but I wonder, will he use someone who is gifted?

I think the problem is, given my many strengths, I definitely have a tendency to rely on myself. I don't easily lean on the Lord when I teach because I'm comfortable speaking. Even if what I say isn't perfect, people will enjoy it. If I was to organize a campus wide worship evening on campus, I would have relied on my people skills and extroverted personality.

It's extremely hard for me to be humble and lean on the Lord because I'm good at many things! I don't mean this as a boast, but rather as a confession. If the Lord uses the weak and the foolish, it is because the wise and strong probably don't think they need God to do things.

Forgive me Lord, and give me the strength to be weak, and the wisdom to be foolish, that I may depend on you instead of my own strengths.