On Christians marrying non-Christians (Romans 8:5)

"For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit." - Romans 8:5

A few weeks ago a lady asked me about Christians marrying non-Christians. Actually, this was the last of several questions, she first asked about gays in the church and then eventually got to this question. I think she may have been trying to justify to herself why she might be interested in marrying a non-christian.

The thing that surprises me most about this question is that it's not obvious to people. If these people really are believers then I would think it would be obvious to them. This passage basically sums it up, our lives are about different things. A believer who is truly trying to follow God will seek God above all else. But if you genuinely do not believe in God then there is little reason to live for anything but yourself.

I imagine in a life without God it is stupid to live for anything other pleasure, money, fame, etc... for these are the things of the world which satisfy (albeit temporarily), these are the things of the flesh. But as believers we're called to set our minds on the things of the Spirit. We are to seek God's kingdom above all and to glorify him before all thing.

If two people with such different life goals get married they simply cannot both whole heartedly pursue them both. There will be times when God calls you to a career which is more about His Kingdom and less about money, but how can a unbelieving spouse possibly understand that? This is just one example of what I imagine would be many many conflicts of interest.

The Lord asks us to be equally yoked, not because He doesn't want us to be the 'one we love' but because He wants what's best for us. And what's best for us is not the things of this world, we need a spouse who understands that.